Performing

Well, my upper is gone. Has been. But I haven't posted since then. I had fun though, it was good while it lasted.

Tomorrow night, I am performing at, what we call, Battle of The Bands at a local skating rink with my brother, Lil' Dough. I don't have a stage name. He is a rapper, and I'm not sure why they allowed that at Battle of The Bands, but hey, I'm not complaining. I'm excited that my brother has performed there, he is really good and everyone loves him. We will see what happens when I perform with him tomorrow. =/ Everyone keeps telling me I have an amazing voice but I guess I don't hear it... Oh well. I'm just doing it because my brother needed a backup singer. I'll let the crowd decide tomorrow how I sound.

We're doing Airplanes which is alright, but I'm excited about my brother's song; Invisible. He wrote the rap, I wrote most of the chorus [he wrote it original, my sister-in-law tweaked it, I then changed it again and added a whole other verse]. I just hope I sound as good as everyone is telling me. I had a singer listen to the recording we did, and he loved it, so did a co-worker of mine, and my boss, among other people. Again, we'll see what happens tomorrow.

I saw my therapist today. When he asked me if I had anything specific I wanted to talk about, I drew a blank. What did I want to talk about? The fact that I have uppers and downers, and the fact that I am performing tomorrow night. I also wanted to mention that I have been taking time to actually do things for myself. I don't know why I blanked out. It was nervewracking. We ended up talking about how I deal with relationships, romantic ones, my family and my father. It was aggravating. When I started talking about my father, I got very passionate and restless. I went from sitting very relaxed and messing with my lip ring [nervous tendencies] to sitting up straight, messing with my hair and getting very angry; talking with my hands, etc. I don't like talking about my father...

Dear Blog,
     You are the only one I can truely talk to.....